Now you think it’s OK to sleep in a hollow rectangular space now, but where does it go from there? How long until you’re going crazy and you won’t settle for less than a dodecahedron?

So a couple weeks ago I made my way down to the land of Octopus and Okonomiyaki, Osaka. I was in the area because I was going to the wedding reception (and after party) of a friend that lives there. Although I do have friends in Osaka I really didn’t have a place where I could stay for the night and, given the location of the party, it would have been difficult to get a bed at a hostel (which I didn’t want to do anyways); so, given my lack of choices, I did something that I, surprisingly, hadn’t accomplished up until the end of last month. What you are about to read is a short description of my stay in a capsule hotel. All of you know what a capsule hotel is and a few of you have spent a night in one, but even in that case there are still some surprising things hiding in the shadows of a capsule.

It’s sleeping men, hallelujah.

Capsule hotels started out as a cheap way for businessmen to stay the night downtown if, for one of many reasons (working late, lots of drinking), they couldn’t make it home. This, combined with the lack of privacy and low number of possible female customers led most of the capsule hotels in Japan to become exclusively for men. Some people probably found this to be sexist, but things have changed since the wominz clientele has increased enough to allow a female only floor to be viable. Like many other types of establishments in Japan where skin is shown (for one reason or another) people who have tattoos aren’t allowed to stay; it’s not the discrimination that many Westerner’s think it is, without this blanket law they would have trouble with Yakuza. Yes, it’s shitty that they have to do such a thing, but if you take care of the gangster problem I feel like they’d be willing to change policy. With the quick, capsule sized, history lesson over with we can now go on to the story.

Much like any regular hotel, a capsule hotel starts with the lobby; unlike other hotels in Japan (probably), this one started on the 7th floor. After getting off the elevator and walking up to the front desk I’m told that I should have taken off my shoes 5 meters earlier which I would’ve realized if I looked down at the gigantic sign on the ground stating that request in two languages. After fixing my mistake and filling out the registration card I was on my way to the wedding reception.

Can you believe how much I’ve changed?

After getting fully soused and a short ride back I make it back to the hotel. When you decide it’s time to crawl into your hole someone at the front desk will give you a key on a plastic bracelet which also has the job of telling you which rectangular prism you’ll be sleeping in. I go towards the staircase that will lead me to my personal 2.5 cu. m. and it’s here, not the actual capsule, where I am surprised; literally everyone else (all men) are wearing white robes and the vast majority of them seem to be transfixed by the TV hanging on the wall. I would have loved to get a picture of this for all of you, but I think they would have noticed and I doubt they would have been happy. As to why they’re wearing robes? It’s probably because they didn’t want to sleep in their suit, but given the fact that there was a sauna and massage parlor (not masquerading as anything else) a couple floors down they could have been wearing them for that reason. I was drunk and tired so I didn’t really care that much to go back downstairs and research.

I love a good back vacuuming.

The sleeping in a capsule part of the experience wasn’t really that bad at all, if I would have to do it again I wouldn’t mind at all. You have enough space to sit up, a small TV, a clock/radio, and a small shelf. Everything worked as expected, though it was obvious who they were catering to when I found the “special” channel (NSFW). The one complaint that I have is that, stupidly, they left out a power outlet. If they would have included one in every capsule I would have been much happier with my experience. (Who wants to have to charge their phone in the middle of the day when they’re away from home?) Overall, not nearly as bad as I was expecting, then again just the fact that I fit in the capsule was a huge plus.

As much as many people have bleated about sleeping in such a small space I’m not really sure why it’s not popular in any other country, especially if you could make a new model with a lockable door; there are many times when all you really want is a shared space that you can share with others and a bed. Does it really matter if you can’t stand on your bed? You don’t have anymore privacy than a hostel and those seem to be quite popular throughout the world. Whatever the reason is for their lack of existence in other countries I feel like it’s the dislike of the image that capsule hotels give off, if people would look at the situation soberly they might change their minds.

Here’s some more pictures and words by someone else if you want more.